James 1:2-4 - "Move"

I know when we are away all day Mordecei will get me up to go out in the middle of the night. When he got me up at 3:15, I was so tired but instead of going back to sleep I started thinking about how our life started to change so drastically a year ago. It was New Year's Eve when Doc told me God had released him from Willard. He asked me to pray about where we were to go. I told him I would but for the first few weeks I didn't because I couldn't believe it. I thought God couldn't have told him that. But as days went on he kept asking me if God had told me anything about it yet. I didn't lie when I told him no. But neither did I tell him I actually had not prayed about it. Once I started praying about it I think God knew I needed some time before He did speak. I will never forget a day in January as I was up in the Christmas closet putting away some things that had been missed and I heard the Lord. I actually turned around to see if someone was in the room with me because it was an audible voice. I was talking to Him and asked if I would be putting away Christmas stuff from this year away in another home. Very clearly I heard, "You will be in South Carolina." What?!?!? I didn't tell Doc that for a few weeks because I thought he would think I was crazy. I don't even know if a resume had been sent to South Carolina at that point or not. We took a vacation to Hilton Head in February to celebrate my healing. While we were traveling down we stopped and had lunch with the DS. He said he didn't have anything open but he had just found out about a church that was going to come open in February. He explained they couldn't pay a pastor so unless we were independently wealthy it wouldn't work. He suggested since we were going to Hilton Head we should spend an afternoon looking around the city. We did just that and felt at peace as we sat by the waterfront. But we knew financially, as the DS said, it would take a miracle for us to come. March brought about another meeting with the DS when he was visiting family in Ohio. He had a smile on his face and said, "I think we found our miracle!" The church would be able to pay some so the pastor would only need to work part-time. We were excited because the more we prayed, the more we knew we were to be here. I was torn from being excited when I knew it would be so hard to leave not only my biological family but also my church family from the last fifteen years. They had been with us through so many things. Both of us had surgeries, my MS exacerbations, death of my Daddy, the boys weddings, births of our grandchildren, etc. We also had just burned the mortgage on the church building and were looking forward to having finances to do ministry. But the whole time of this emotional roller coaster the Lord gave me peace. It was so hard not be able to talk to anyone about how I was feeling. I would pack boxes and cry. I would be planning church events that I knew I wasn't even going to be there for yet I couldn't say anything. Life was tough emotionally but I knew God was in control. If we didn't walk through the door He put before us, we would not be walking in His will. We could not allow our emotions, people's words once we told them we were leaving or anything stop us. Instead we knew we must continue on His path. He continued to open doors for finances with providing us the down payment for our home, the sale of a lot of items, etc. He also continued to give physical strength on days that were so hard. I will never forget the miracle He performed in me driving our truck pulling our trailer to move. His strength was my strength in a mighty way. The first few months in South Carolina were busy with not only our home but also adjusting to a new church, a new city and being away from what we knew as our normal for the last fifteen years. Six plus months later in looking back over those months I am amazed at what all has happened and what hasn't happened. The four surgeries and a diagnosis of breast cancer have been ones I never expected to go through. Yet God is my strength and my peace. Doc still not having a part-time job is another thing I never expected yet God continues to provide. Not going home to see family over the holidays was not what I imagined yet God was so gracious in loving me through some tough days. Still not having our own church building continues to be challenging yet I know God is working in all of us. There were a lot of 'last' events that happened in Ohio before leaving that were very difficult. Here in South Carolina there have been a lot of 'first' events. Some have been fun and enjoyable while others were difficult. The greatest thing about both the 'lasts' and the 'firsts' is that God was the director of all of them. He was the One who orchestrated every one of them. I am so grateful for that! I continue to stand on His empowerment through the 'good' days and the 'tough' days. I will never forget one day in particular as I was struggling with the whole move thing and He encouraged me through a dear sister in Christ. The Lord spoke to her one morning in February before we even knew where we were moving to. He told her to tell me:

My fellow Comrad, We are in a Battle but we know who the Champion is. In prayer this a.m. I heard this while praying for you and Pastor Doc-God is giving you Marching Orders. Full speed ahead. Onward Christian Soldier. Blessings. We are in this together. He is the Author and Finisher of our faith. Love ya!

Immediately when I read those words the Lord gave me the song "Move" by Mercy Me. There is a part of it that goes...

There's gonna be brighter days...

I just might bend but I won't break
As long as I can see your face

Wow! He knew I needed to be encouraged to keep walking down the path He was giving us. He knew there would be days where I felt like I couldn't go on but He also knew I would be filled with His strength if I continued to live in His Spirit. He is so good! Once again I am reminded of James 1:2-4 and am grateful for His words. I am grateful for the way He has shown me that change is OK when He orchestrates it. I also am grateful for the way He has opened doors to new ministries and relationships in my new little world. If I were not living a life consecrated to Him, I would be missing so much.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for this past year and for the year that is ahead. Thank You for loving me through not only the 'good' days but also the 'tough' ones. Thank You for filling me to overflowing so people will see and hear You through me today. Lord, You are so awesome in the way You take care of things. I continue to be amazed with so many things but I shouldn't because You do amazing things! Thank You for being My Orchestrator! Amen.

James 1:2-3 - "Jesus Bring The Rain"

3:19AM...God woke me up to pray for a single Mom and her little boy for protection. I got the sense it wasn't for a personal protection but rather for a spiritual one. As I prayed He told me to tell her that her life will be easier when she draws closer to Him. I have not seen nor talked with this young lady for a long time. I don't know how she will take these words but I will be obedient. As soon as I finished praying for her He brought another family to my mind to pray for that are going through some very difficult times. As I prayed for them a song He gave me yesterday came to me and I was amazed at how He speaks to me. The words to this song are ones many can't sing because they are not in a relationship with Him to allow it.

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

The freedom found in living a life of holiness can compare to nothing one can ever experienced without it. The desire to live for Him 'no matter what that means' is a desire that will bring pain and suffering. It won't matter what happens as long as it brings Him glory. Yesterday as I stood in line for a prescription I had a conversation with a lady that blessed me dearly. She saw my Scripture scarf which sparked up a conversation. Here she was with her oxygen and she was praising the Lord. She said she didn't know how people 'do life' without Him. I agreed and told her He has been my strength for the last twenty-two years as I battled MS and is now my strength with C. She asked how C was going for me. I told her I had just left a radiation treatment and things were good. She looked at me and said I was beautiful. I will never forget 'Norma' as she asked my name and told me she would pray for me. I may never see that sweet lady again but I know she is sending prayers up on my behalf. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for yesterday's conversation with Norma. I pray blessings over her. I also pray again for the young mother and family You brought to me during the night. Father, sometimes I am amazed at how You use me but I am grateful You wake me to pray. Some people would say there is no point to praying because You already know everything. I pray because You tell me to. It is a way I communicate with You that benefits me greatly. Prayer draws me closer to You Lord and for that I am grateful. Lord You already know this but "bring the rain"...whatever that means as long as it glorifies You. I also pray for my brother as he goes through testing with his C today. Lord, draw Him closer to You through these days. I pray for non-believing family members to find You through his suffering. Thank You Jesus for being My Rainmaker. Amen.

James 4:3 - "Exhale"

As I starting reading James 4 the Lord stopped me to ponder the third verse. I know my asking has changed drastically. I use to ask for such things as, "Lord, please don't let there be cancer in the outcome of this biopsy." Now my prayers have changed to, "Lord, be glorified in whatever the outcome of this biopsy is." I still catch myself praying things such as, "Lord please don't let me have to take chemo or radiation." It was after praying those words that the Lord checked me and I changed to, "Lord please give me Your supernatural strength to do whatever is ahead. May You be glorified." It is not possible in the physical or emotional bodies to pray in this way. But it is possible when we allow the Holy Spirit free reign in our lives. Yes, there are still times where emotions come into play and the tears fall. But He is holding us in His hands and encouraging us through such times. There are times we feel like we can't go on and He reminds us we don't have to go on in our own strength but rather have His supernatural strength. 

The fourth chapter of James is one that encourages us to live holy lives. Everyone needs to examine their way of life, evaluate it by God's standards, make changes and become people to live a grace-reliant life. We cannot do this evaluation according to the world's standards but instead it must be done in God's standards. We must ask ourselves if the way we are living is the way He desires of us. Are we praying selfishly or are we praying eternally? Are there things we are doing in life that do not please the Lord? Are we able to hear His Voice? If so, are we following His commands? Do we rely on Him, trusting Him to take care of all our needs or do we fret over finances? I like the words of Douglas Webster. "Grace-reliant is the most far-reaching, life-changing, radical stance we need to learn to rely on God." Woo hoo! Yes! We must be humble before Him in order to live such a life. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for yesterday! Thank You for today! Thank You for tomorrow! I know no matter what comes my way I am in Your hands. I praise You for being here with me through these days. I praise You for being my supernatural strength. I praise You for loving me so greatly. Lord, You are so awesome. I want to be more like You. The only way that can happen is for You to fill me up with more of You so people will see and hear You instead of me. Thank You for being The One I Rely On. Amen.

James 4:13-15 - "Break Every Chain"

As I read James 4 this morning I was reminded of how my life use to be before I surrendered everything to Him. Verses thirteen through fifteen remind me of how I use to be bound to my lists. I had lists for my lists. It was the way I thought I would be able to survive in such a chaotic world. In order to accomplish everything that 'needed done' I had to have my list to go by. I am so thankful for the day the Lord told me to get rid of my lists and follow His lead. I never thought I could live without a list but soon found out the freedom in such a life. He gives me the direction each and every day to do what He desires of me. The key in living such a life is staying in His presence. If I am not living in His presence, I cannot hear and/or desire to follow His lead. I don't want to be "just a vapor..." as in verse fourteen but instead want to be a constant as He is in my life. I want to be something that people will know will be there and they can depend upon just as He is in my life. Oh how I pray for more believers and non-believers to come into such relationship. It is only when one does that true freedom is found. I have heard many people say, "I don't have time to go to church" or "I will go to church when I get my life straightened out." But when one goes to church and sees the love of Jesus being lived out in people, they will desire the same. Not everyone in church though is living out His love. Not only is that sad for them but it is sad for those who come seeking His love. Once again I pray for people to truly live out Jesus' love.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for the reminders of James 4. Thank You for the freedom You gave me from lists. Lord, You are so awesome in how You work in and through me. Father, fill me to overflowing with more of You so I will continue to say follow Your will for my life. I pray for more of You to empower my words, actions and attitude today. Father, thank You for using me yesterday with the one in pain. I pray she will trust You in a deeper degree. I pray for her healing not only in her physical body but most importantly in her spiritual body. Father, thank You for the opportunities You are giving me through C. Thank You for being My Freedom. Amen.

Mark 5:34 - "No Room"

"God gives His supernatural empowerment once we make the choice to live such a life and be reliant on His grace." I realized His supernatural empowerment in what happened soon after I wrote these words this morning. As I was going for my treatment a song I don't believe I have heard before came on the radio. It is called "No Room" by Kolby Koloff. As I listened to it the Lord brought to my mind one I had prayed for during the night. He told me to pray for her to trust Him with her back pain. I sent her a message with some of the lyrics to the song...

Oh, I'm handing over all my fears
Knowing you will meet me here
Fill my heart up with truth
'Til there's no room, no room at all
Why do I ever doubt
Even when I'm lost I'm found
Fill my heart up with you
'Til there's no room, no room
It's just you, all you
'Til there's no room, no room

Her response was: "Thank you so much! I LOVE it! I will listen to it daily. I think He was trying to tell me to trust Him and hand it to Him last night. Wow, He's amazing...and so are you! I'm very thankful for you. You encourage me more than you know." Her pain was intense last night and as she prayed she felt like He was telling her to trust Him yet she questioned whether she was imaging it or not. Him having me share with her this song and telling her I prayed during the night for her was confirmation that He indeed was talking to her.

I am not glad cancer was found in my breast but I am glad He is using me to make a difference in one's life that I would have never known without the cancer. Living in His presence means not only hearing what He says but following His direction. It means when you are woke up in the middle of the night to pray, you pray. There is no better place to be than in His supernatural empowerment. A few weeks ago I prayed for this one for a healing from her back pain. I know she was disappointed healing didn't come. But I also know my God is still in the healing business and He will heal her. I am believing she will hear these words from Mark 5:34, He said to her, "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering."

Dear Jesus, 
Thank You for loving me so greatly that You gave me another glimpse of how You are using me for Your glory. Bless this one with a complete healing not just in her physical body but most importantly in her spiritual body. Thank You Jesus for being My Director. Amen.

James 4:4-10 - "He Loves Us"

In reading James four today the Lord focused my thoughts on verses four through ten. It reminds me of the choice Jesus gave us to decide whether we would take the wide or the narrow way in Matthew 7:13-14. It is not only important to make such a decision but there is an urgency in it. All must make the choice of following the ways of the world or following the Lord. Everyone must choose in allowing self to be in control of their checkbook, calendar, family, etc. or allowing God control. When one makes the choice of the world, they are described as "adulteresses" in James 4:4. This is not describing a non-believer but instead James is writing of a believer. One can accept the Lord into their heart and still not allow Him full control. That believer is not part of the True Church but rather is living a false Christian life. As a believer lives out envy and selfish ambition with actions of fighting we are not only treating others with hatred but in essence are doing the same to God. This not only hurts God but it also makes him a jealous God. His jealousy is what enables Him to give people grace when they consecrate their life to Him. He yearns to have all be in such relationship with Him. The way to do that is found in verse ten. We are to "Humble ourselves in the presence of the Lord..." This is also found in Proverbs 3:34, Luke 14:11 and Luke 19:14. The result of such living is that of love and peace. There are three promises to grasp and live out from these verses...

Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
Come near to God and he will come near to you.

Wash your hands, you sinners,
and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Grieve, mourn and wail.
Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom.

Living a life reliant on God's grace is the best life to life. There is freedom in...

• not worrying over what to do or say
• loving on all instead of wondering what someone else will say about you
• not having to second guess your actions
• loving with His love instead of worldly love.

Plain and simple. Living a life reliant on Him is living for eternity not just for the time on this earth. It may seem strange and even hard to live such a life but it is not. God gives His supernatural empowerment once we make the choice to live such a life and be reliant on His grace. Salvation is not enough. All must take the next step in relationship with Him in order to live with Him for eternity.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for the words of James 4. Thank You for the way You empower me each and every day to live a life toward eternity with You instead of a life with worldly pleasures. Thank You for the day that is ahead. I praise You for #14 that will be accomplished today. I praise You for the way You will give me supernatural strength to not only get through this day but to see and hear the opportunities You put before me. Father, do not let my tiredness become a distraction to the desires of Your heart. Actually I am praying for the tiredness from the lack of sleep to be gone. In Your Holy Name, I pray it to be gone. Show Your strength through me today in a mighty way. Thank You for being My Empowerment. Amen.

I Timothy 6:11-12 - "Be Like You"

How is it even possible my 'baby' is thirty-two years old? Where has the time gone? Wasn't it just yesterday we were fussing with him to 'just eat one green bean'? Now he is a godly man, the proud Daddy of four great kids and a wonderful wife. I think of the charge Paul gave to Timothy in I Timothy 6:11-12 when I think of Ben...

But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness,faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confessionin the presence of many witnesses. 

Previously in this chapter Paul had written about how Timothy had taken his calling and lived it out. Ben is doing just that. I am so proud of the way he is using his calling to be Jesus in this hurting world. He has found a way to share God's love outside of the confines of the church. I love how one commentator writes about a person who lives this way. "He that is godly, is sure to be happy in another world; and if contented with his condition in this world, he has enough, and all truly godly people are content." Content with being where God puts us is key. Ben has found that key and for that I am grateful. As I think back on his growing up years I am reminded of how proud he was to come home with a box of groceries from helping his Grandma at the free store. He would pull out a couple of boxes of cereal with a big smile on his face. He knew he was providing for our family in a way that was so needed. I smiled because I knew he was learning values that would be so beneficial to him in life. The values instilled in him growing up are ones he will never forget. He is instilling those same values in his own children. I was one proud Momma as my Momma shared with me on how well behaved his children were at her house. I told her it wasn't just because they were there, that's how they are being raised. My Daddy would be so proud of Ben and the man he has grown to be. I wish he were here to see him and his family. Oh how I miss my Daddy being here with us. I also miss our time with Ben and his family and am looking forward to when we can get together again. This will be one of the few years I won't be making him a cheesecake for his birthday. I remember the year I spent ALOT of money and bought him a 'real' cheesecake only to be disappointed to hear "I don't like it...I like my regular one!" Silly boy! Who would prefer an Aldi cheap box mix to a real baked one?!?!? Yep, that would be Ben! 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for blessing us with Ben! Thank You for the godly man You have grown him into being! Father, I pray blessings on him and his family today. I pray they will be blessed in abundance with more of You in their lives. I also pray for a soothing in this Momma's heart to be separated from them. Lord, I know I am exactly where You desire me to be but it is days like today that are so hard. Fill my spiritual tank to overflowing so my hurts will not be a distraction from doing what You desire of me. Thank You Jesus for being The One to Bless Me. Amen.

Isaiah 55:8-9 - "Happy Birthday Jesus"

I woke up so many times during the night. One time I chuckled and thought to myself 'you would think I am kid excited for Santa Claus'! One child told me yesterday they were going to bed early so Santa would come. Another told me he was going to stay up all night to see Santa. I love the way children are excited for such things. I know some people don't celebrate Santa because he isn't what Christmas is all about. But when you stop and think about it, he is. Gift giving began years ago when God sent His Son to this earth as a gift for all mankind. The wisemen brought gifts to Baby Jesus which is another example we can follow. A lot of people have got out-of-hand and spend money they don't have which is not the point. The point is to give, not to outspend others. The best gifts of all are those from the heart not from the store. Homemade goodies, gift certificates for doing chores or babysitting, etc. are the very best things of all. Giving of yourself with love is the best gift of all. This year was a year of firsts in so many ways but especially around the holidays. The first year... 

• being away from family
• not having extra money to buy as in the past
• being in our own home
• being weary but not from MS...instead from C
• being in a warm climate for Christmas

The best part about these firsts was the peace the Lord gave me. Oh yes, there were still some tears as we watched the family gathering on glide. There were also tears as I opened up new Scripture scarves from Doc. One had "overcomer" on it with various Scripture. Another had "Nothing is impossible with God" on it. At the end of the day he told me he was surprised with how well I did throughout the day. Even though I was extremely tired in my physical body I felt the Lord with me in my emotional body. My spiritual body was definitely filled up which enabled me to accept His peace. Once again I know beyond a shadow of a doubt we are exactly where He desires us to be. Things have not gone as we would choose for them to go in different areas of life. C was not part of our plan...still not being in our own church building was not part of our plan...Doc still not having a part-time job was not part of our plan. But the key is 'our plan'! Our plan is not what is important. God's plan is the only thing that matters. His gift of salvation and life with Him for eternity is so much greater than anything I can gift Him with. My obedience and desire to live a life for Him 24/7, fulfilling the opportunities He gives me to be His love to others is the greatest gift I can give Him. 

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for coming to this earth just to die for all mankind. Thank You for the peace You gave me yesterday. Thank You for my Momma sharing with me about Miss Clementine looking for 'Grandma Sheila and Papa Doc'! She was afraid it would make me cry but instead it gave me joy in knowing she has not forgotten us. Father, would You please make it possible for a trip to share Christmas with them after my treatments are done? Lord, would You also make it possible for people to see and hear You through me today? Would You take away the distraction of weariness so I will not miss any opportunity to be You to others? Would You give me what I need in my physical body in order to accomplish what You desire through me? It seems like I am asking a lot but Father most of all I just want to fulfill the desires of Your heart. Thank You for being My Fulfillment! Amen.

James 4:10 - "Blessings"

I love how the Lord is using me in ways twenty years ago would not have been possible. Writing what He gives me nearly every morning blesses me in abundance. Wisdom is gained as I reflect on songs He gives me, directs me to specific Scripture, etc. This morning I was blessed when I saw the different countries that represent people who are reading my blog. Not only people from the United States but also: Russia, France, Germany, Poland, United Kingdom, Ukraine, Portugal, China, India and Kenya. I got to thinking about how many of these people maybe only have a glimpse of the Lord through what I write. I wonder how many of them do not even own their own Bible. Thank You Jesus for this opportunity to share You with others. I probably will never know the stories behind those who read what I write but I know if they accept the Lord and live for Him they will receive eternal life. The other day I was talking with someone who was saying someone they knew was getting their affairs in order as they battled disease. I pray for everyone to do that with their spiritual lives, not just those who appear to be dying. I pray for people to realize we all need God to not only be Lord of Lords but to be King of Kings in our lives. We all need to not only accept Him into our heart but to submit to His will. Submitting to His will is why we are in South Carolina. Listening to His call and following the doors He opened is why we left Ohio. My heart aches to not be with my family today but He gives peace in knowing I am exactly where He desires me to be. Someone recently asked me why He would cause me so much pain by taking me away from family. My response was, "He loves me." Plain and simple. He loves me. He desires the best for me. The pain I experience being away from family is nothing compared to what Jesus experienced when He came to this earth to die for all of our sins. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for loving me so greatly! Thank You for continuing to deepen my faith! Thank You for being with me today in a mighty way! I pray blessings over each one who reads this. I pray You will bless them in abundance with spiritual blessings. I also pray for Adam today as he celebrates his thirty-seventh birthday. I pray blessings over him and Rachel in a mighty way. I pray blessings over those in my family who will gather today at my Momma's house. Lord, thank You for Your peace that wraps around me today. Thank You for Your love that will ooze out of me to all I meet. Bless all who come for our time of Family Communion today. May they see and hear You through my words, actions and attitude. Thank You Jesus for being the One to Bless Me. Amen.

James 3:13-18 - "Love Came Down"

I woke this morning to these words going through my mind...

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours
Lord I'm forever Yours
Mountains high or valley low
I sing out and remind my soul
I am Yours
I am forever Yours

What a great reminder for not just myself but for all. No matter what we go through in life, He is our constant when we allow Him to take up residence in us. We can't just give Him part of us but we must give Him all with no holding back. There's a part in this song that I believe the Lord knew would enable me to not only just get through this first Christmas away from my family but to enjoy it....

If the storms of life they come
And the road ahead gets steep
I will lift these hands in faith
I will believe

In my mind, I know I am exactly where the Lord desires me to be. I know I am doing what He desires of me. It does not have to make sense to me but it still is hard to be separated from my family. This isn't a 'storm of life' but it is a road that is 'steep' in my life right now. C is a 'storm' and MS is a 'storm' but praise the Lord He is my strength in such storms. He also is my strength when my emotions get the better of me and the tears come. My faith has deepened through the storms and through this move. I not only have faith in Him knowing the best life for me but I have hope in my future.

When my heart is filled with hope
Every promise comes my way
When I feel Your hands of grace
Rest upon me

I also know the only way to be where He desires me to be is to live consecrated to Him. I must be able to say that I am "Staying desperate for You, God" and "Staying humble at Your feet" in order to live in His presence. It is in His presence that His peace is found. It is in His presence that He will bless me in abundance in so many ways. It is in His presence that He will give me His wisdom for all I do. James 3 talks about wisdom as being a gift from the Lord. In his first chapter James told us that we must ask for wisdom. In order to ask for wisdom we must be in relationship with Him with an active prayer life. We must be dependent upon Him for every aspect of our life. In 3:13 it reads, "Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom." Wisdom, true wisdom, is only attainable through a humble spirit. It is not something we can attain through ourself but rather must come from God. False wisdom may make people 'feel good' but it cannot come from God. It takes a life of faith to live out true wisdom. I like how one commentator wrote about it. "True wisdom can be had only by people who live in active reliance on God." Woo hoo! 'Active reliance!' I like that way of living even when it doesn't make sense to others.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for Your love! Thank You for coming to this earth in the form of a tiny babe in order to die on the cross for all! Lord, I pray You will be my wisdom in a mighty way today. I pray You will be my words, actions and attitude throughout this day in a mighty way. Fill me to overflowing with more of You! Fill my cup to overflowing in order for people to see and hear You through me! Thank You for being My Wisdom! Amen.

James 1:2-3; Philippians 4:13; Nehemiah 8:10b - "Oceans"

Yesterday was a very trying day emotionally and mentally. Over the last few months with dealing with C I have missed doing some things that needed done with our medicine. I missed ordering Doc’s diabetes medicine when I should have. Therefore, we had to get a new prescription and do a new application for assistance. Then after getting the new prescription and filling out the new application I didn’t mail it in a timely manner. The result is he doesn’t have his medication. Urgh! Then with my MS medicine assistance I somehow missed filling out the application when I was suppose to and now they don’t have funds. I was at peace with my situation because I truly believe if I am to take it, God will provide. But yesterday when I was told my insurance wouldn’t allow my co-pay assistance to be used I became frustrated. Why after all these months would that be? Making another phone call and getting someone who didn’t speak nor understand English very well was nerve racking. I ended up crying and hanging up after forty minutes of frustration. I know James 1:2-3 tells me to be joyful in all circumstances. I also know Nehemiah 8:10b tells me that His joy is my strength. Philippians 4:13 tells me that “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” I know all of those things. I know them. Plain and simple. I know them. BUT when the emotions of a menopausal, radiation treatment woman come into play those things get put aside. I knew I could not allow the enemy any foothold into my life. I also knew if I cried it out I would feel better so as Doc held me and allowed me to cry His strength took over. Not only did I go to church but I enjoyed it. Boy was I wiped out by the time I went to bed. This morning when I woke up at 6:30 I asked God if I could have just another half hour of sleep and He gave me another hour and a half! Nine and half hours of sleep can do wonders for not only a physical body but also the mental and emotional body! Today is a new day! Neither of our medication issues are resolved but God’s got both of these situations. Maybe this is the time for us to be healed from these diseases and be done with medication. Or maybe God just needed to deepen my trust in Him. I have no idea but I don’t need to know. He knows and that’s all that matters. I do know He blessed me with a letter in the mailbox yesterday saying all of my hospital bills will be covered at 100% through the first of June and for that I am thankful.

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for blessing me with a good night’s sleep! Thank You for the day that is ahead! Lord, bless me in abundance with more of You so people will see and hear You through me today. I pray for a filling into my spirit of Your words, action and attitude today. Thank You for being The One I Trust. Amen.

James 2:14-26 - "Be One"

As I was reading the second section of James 2 this morning I thought about how many times I've told people "I will pray for you" instead of stopping and praying with them right then. It wasn't a lack of faith that made me do it but rather it was usually a time issue. I have tried being more intentional in having action and not just words when it comes to being with people and praying. Personally, I know when people pray with me I am blessed in abundance. I don't remember ever reading in the Bible where Jesus said, "I will pray for you" but instead he acted upon situations. As I live to be Christ-like I need to do the same. I need to take time for people and live out the desires of the Lord's heart. This does not only pertain to my prayer life but to helping those in need. If someone needs something and I don't have the means to provide it, I need to listen to the Lord as to how to get it for them. When I seek Him with faith that He will provide, He will if it is a true need. Many times people are deceiving in asking for things. We can't always knows their hearts but the Lord does. Therefore, if we seek Him in every situation He will give us the answer as to if or how to provide something. 

Dear Jesus, 
Thank You for the faith You have instilled in me. Thank You for the relationship we are in that allows me to know the desires of Your heart. Father, I pray for focus today. I pray for Your will to be known to me in a greater way so I don't miss anything from You. Thank You for yesterday. Thank You for today. Thank You for tomorrow. Lord, continue to encourage me through these days. Continue to give me more of You so I can be a reflection of You to all who come in contact with me. I pray they will see and hear You through me. Lord, bless me in abundance as I bless You throughout this day. Thank You for being My Faith! Amen.

James 2:1 - "Fix My Eyes"

As I read the first section of James 2 this morning I reflected upon the people I have invited to church since we've been in South Carolina. Doctors, nurses, cashiers, waitresses/waiters along with people on the street. This past Sunday I invited a man riding his bicycle when we went to pick up the mail at the post office. This section of Scripture directs us not to show favoritism on who we share the Lord with. I don't hold back no matter what the circumstances. Instead I invite anyone the Holy Spirit directs me to invite. Everyone needs the Lord. There are no exceptions. There are even people who go to church every Sunday that need the Lord. Some are in a church with a pastor that does not preach the Truth. Others may be in a situation where there is a distraction of some sort that makes them be unable to hear the Truth. If the Holy Spirit directs me to invite someone to church, there is a reason. Once people come into a church they must feel accepted by all. Sometimes a body of believers is not all that acceptable to new people. That is sad. I was told of one church not long ago who purchased a smaller building because they wanted their group to be comfortable just as they are, with no growth. Wow! I cannot even imagine having that mindset! Another church is not having services on Sunday because it is Christmas! What?!?!?!? Isn't Christ what Christmas is all about?!?!?!? I can't imagine not being in church on Christmas. Churches should be packed for services as we celebrate the Lord's birth. They should be packed every Lord's Day but especially on Christmas. Instead people will choose to stay home for 'family time' when in fact the whole family should be in worship. Some will use the excuse the children want to play with their new toys. To them I would say new toys are not going to provide eternal life. Some will say they have to stay home to make Christmas dinner. Nobody will starve if dinner is later in the day. Excuses are used every week as to why one can't go to church, read their Bible, pray, etc. Excuses are just that... excuses. There is no excuse we can give the Lord for not sharing His love with others by inviting them to church, loving on them, making them feel special, etc. None. Jesus came to this earth to die for all. It is everyone's responsibility to believe in Him and to share His love with everyone we come in contact with. If we don't fulfill those responsibilities, we are not fulfilling the desires of His heart.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for all of the opportunities You provide for me to share Your love with others. I pray You will keep my focus on You so I do not miss any opportunity. Father, thank You for the rest yesterday that I so needed after the full day Sunday. Thank You for the way You loved on me as I rested. Thank You for the opportunities today to be You to others. Go before me and give me Your words and actions. Fill me to overflowing with more of You so there is no doubt I am a beacon of light for You. I pray for Your love to ooze out of me in a mighty way. Father, "fix my eyes" on You! Thank You for being My Focus. Amen.

James 2:1-13 - "When Love Was Born"

It is interesting to read James 2 after hearing Doc's sermon yesterday on love. In this chapter James writes about the commandment Love your neighbor as yourself to describe how we are to treat one another. This law for all people of faith is the law of love that was taught in the Old Testament and given by Jesus in the New Testament. James writes about favoritism violating this law in chapter two. As one lives out this law, they need to love all people regardless of their race, appearance, wealth, etc. We all have people who seem to not fit in wherever we go yet we are to love them as Jesus loved them. We are not to show favoritism to anyone but instead love all. So many times I have heard horror stories of people in leadership in churches who have hurt others by showing favoritism or having their own little cliche. That does not show the love of the Lord. Therefore, James writes when one shows favoritism they are breaking His law. He also writes about how when one breaks one law they are breaking the whole law (vs 10). I was reading a commentary on this that said:

The point of emphasizing the whole law is that the whole law is to be kept. The status of the royal law, then, is that it is indispensable. If we are believers in Christ (that is, "ones who have faith in Christ," as stated in 2:1), then we must follow the teachings of Christ. We must bring our relationships under the lordship of Christ. That is why, in 2:8-11, James elaborates with repetition on the fact that favoritism makes one a lawbreaker. The message is, Don't think you are keeping the law of Christ while you are practicing favoritism. It is as much a contradiction as if you claimed you were keeping the law just because you were not committing adultery even though you were practicing murder. James's language is stark and emphatic in 2:9: If you show favoritism, you sin.

Last night was so neat bringing our worlds together for our Christmas Open House. When Mom asked how many were coming, I told her it could be ten or it could be fifty. I had no idea. We were pleased to have thirty-five come from the church, our neighborhood and other friends we have met since moving here. It was rewarding to watch people get to know one another. It was really cool to see neighbors who didn't really know each other converse for extended periods of time. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for the strength You gave us yesterday to not only 'get through' the day with Sunday School, Worship, a memorial service and then our Open House but to enjoy the day. Father, Your strength was perfect! Your love was in abundance throughout the day and I pray it flowed out of us to all we came in contact with. Lord, today is a new day. It is a day where I need filled with with Your supernatural strength as I am so tired. I can't 'do' this day without Your empowerment. I wish I could just crawl back into bed but I know I can't do that. I do not want my tiredness to cause me to miss an opportunity to be You to others who I come into contact with today. Please keep me focused on You. I pray You will be my attitude, my words and my actions throughout this day. Thank You Jesus for being My Everything. Amen.

James 1:13 - 15 - "Joyful, Joyful"

The Lord woke me up early to pray for the day. I know our day is jam packed full with Sunday School, Morning Worship, a Memorial Service and then our Christmas Open House. He had me praying for not just us but for all ministry leaders to not allow distractions to take away from His desires for us. He prompted me to pray specifically for pastors to preach boldly and worship leaders to be joyful. A person going up to the pastor right before worship and saying "I need to talk to you" is one of the biggest distractions of all. I use to be the 'bad guy' who would protect my husband from people in between Sunday School and church. I would tell them he would speak to them after church but not before. Many couldn't understand why he couldn't talk to them but if people only realized how much concentration a pastor has to have they would. Having phone calls that a worship team member or two won't be there for service is a huge distraction to a worship leader. They can't just pull someone else in at the last minute without practice. But the thing all ministry leaders need to remember is God is in control. If the enemy gets an open door, God will close it when a leader asks Him. An open door from the enemy does not mean a ministry leader has to allow it to stay open and affect the service. The Lord took me back to James 1 and stopped me at verses thirteen through fifteen. God does not tempts us with evilness. Only the enemy can do that. Therefore, when someone brings something not from God before a ministry leader they must recognize it not being from God and dismiss it. Too many times ministry leaders will fret for days over things brought before them. It is only when they sincerely seek the Lord's guidance they find His peace. This morning the Lord had me praying for one who is fretting over something someone told them. This person is fretting to the point that when they go into the pulpit this morning they are considering resigning not only from their church but from the pastorate. My prayer is before that occurs they will realize it is a lie from the enemy and receive His peace.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for yesterday and all the ways You blessed me! Thank You for my husband who helps me so much! Lord, I pray for today to be a day full of opportunities to show Your love to many. I pray Resa's family will find Your peace as they grieve her senseless death. I pray for ones who killed her to find Your peace. Lord, be with all ministry leaders today and fill them to overflowing with more of You. I especially pray for this one who is do distraught ...may they find Your peace. Lord, fill me to overflowing with You so all who see or hear me today will see or hear You. Thank You for being My Peace. Amen.

James 1:27 - "Press On"

The Lord took me back to James 1 again this morning. The beginning part encourages me to keep on pressing on no matter what comes my way. There is so much teaching in this chapter but once again He had me pondering on the very last verse. I love to think about what "Pure and undefiled religion" looks like. It gives me the picture of something that is snow white without any ugliness to it. When I looked up the definition of undefiled, I found:

1. not damaged or sullied

2. not made morally impure

3. not polluted or made dirty

4. not desecrated

That is exactly what the Lord desires of us. He wants our focus to be on Him in a way the world can't have control of any aspect of our lives. His desire is for our thoughts to be His thoughts and our ways to be His ways. One thing He has been working on me these last few months is to align my attitude with His attitude. The world can easily pull us into feeling ugly in our spirits by all of the 'junk' that comes along. People's actions and bad attitudes can rub off on us and make us fall into the trap of criticizing, gossiping, etc. We must stay focused on Him in order to stay "Pure and undefiled." As we do, His love will abound from us in abundance. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You once again for the first chapter of James. Thank You for the richness found in his words. Father, I pray for more of You in me so that I can be "Pure and undefiled" each and every day. I pray for the empowerment of the Holy Spirit to give me supernatural power to not allow people or circumstances to take my focus off of You. Lord, go before me this day and bless me with 20/20 vision on You. Thank You Father for being My Focus. Amen.

James 1:27 - "Blessings"

Hearing the words, "Will you pray for me?" was music to my ears. When I asked this one if I could pray with her a couple days ago, she was hesitant and said "I'm not religious." But then yesterday she told me with a smile on her face, "After you prayed for me my day was wonderful!" When I asked what specifically I could pray for, she told me for her emotions. As I prayed the Lord guided me to pray for her specifically for the holidays. I'm not sure what her home situation is but no matter what holidays seem to bring out a lot of stress in people. During the night I was awake for over two hours so I prayed for people for the holidays to be joyful instead of horrible. I prayed for those who deal with....

• separation from their children due to divorce or other circumstances
• financial woes...especially those who over spend just because they think they have to
• emotional issues for those don't have money as in the past to spend on buying gifts
• a loved one who is addicted
• the loss of a loved one whether recent or not
• loneliness
• anger over worldly situations
• disease that is taking away their joy

Most of all I prayed for people who do not have the hope of Jesus Christ in their life. I prayed for someone to make a difference in their life as I am making a difference in this one's life through praying with her. So many times in the past I have told people "I will pray for you" but now if the Holy Spirit prompts me to pray with them I do. It may seem 'stupid' or they may say 'no' when I ask but that doesn't matter. When going out to eat, we tell waiters/waitresses we are going to pray for our meal and ask how we can pray for them. I love when they bow their heads or even drop to their knees and pray with us! Most people are surprised when we tell them we are going to pray for them. Some even get tears in their eyes. But the thing I think it the coolest part of it is that they know someone cares about them. We all need to feel loved. I am grateful when people make me feel unloved I still have the love of Jesus warming my heart. I honestly do not understand how people can live in this world without Him. "I'm not religious..." I do not ever want to have a 'religious' spirit. All I want to be is Jesus' love in a pure and blameless way. I was so blessed yesterday when I opened the box from Corey, Tish and my Elkins Naz Family with the beautiful prayer shawl. It blesses me in abundance to know people are praying for me. It gave me the Holy Spirit goosebumps to think about how the person making it prayed for me and then it was laid on the altar and prayed over. Wow! They are living out what God desires of them. They are fulfilling James 1:27...."Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world." That is what I desire in my life...to be kept 'unstained by the world' and live out the desires of His heart.

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for all of the blessings of yesterday...the opportunity to pray with one who says "I'm not religious," the energy You gave me through Your supernatural power, the beautiful prayer shawl I received...oh my the blessings were in abundance! Thank You for the day ahead! Thank You for the accomplishment that will be made through #8 today! Father, thank You for C that has opened new doors for me to be You to others! Wow, I never thought I would say that but You continue to provide open doors and I am thankful! Fill me to overflowing so people will see and hear You through me today! Be my words, actions and attitude throughout this day. I am so excited it is Friday! I get to spend the day with my hubby without the distraction of 'church stuff'...well, for the most part. I know with all going on with the building he has already received a call this morning but I am grateful he does not have to fill guilty for spending time with me today! He fills my emotional tank up and for that I am grateful. Thank You for being the One To Bless Me. Amen.

James 1:22 - "One Thing Remains"

I love mornings when I wake up early and snuggle in the warm bed talking to my Heavenly Daddy. I remember when I was a little girl snuggling and talking with my earthly Daddy. Of course, living on the farm that didn't happen in the mornings very often! But after he came in in the evenings we would have dinner and talk. In the summertime we would go to park to watch ballgames and in the winter we would go to whatever church was having a revival. On the weekends when my Momma was off from the hospital we would take drives. It's kind of funny to think about because that sure wouldn't be done in today's society. People are too busy, gas is too expensive and who would ever think to go for a drive just to go for a drive! Oh how I cherish these memories. Life wasn't perfect in my life. I didn't have everything I wanted and my family had their share of problems. But through it all I was blessed in abundance as I reflect back on not only the 'good' times but the 'bad' times. The Lord was always with me. I remember as a little girl being afraid of being in a bedroom by myself. I couldn't have been more than seven or eight when my last older sibling moved out. I had been use to sleeping with one or two of them until that point in life. As I laid in bed and prayed the Lord came to me in a vision. I had a big picture window in my room and He showed up there and told me something along the lines that I was not alone. That vision gave me such peace. One Sunday I remember being told to go to the preacher's office after Sunday school before going to church and wondering what I had done wrong. As I sat there and he told me he needed my help to call my older siblings about the tragedy in my family I remember him praying with me for God to be with me. I also remember leaving the church,  taking him to our house and showing him where the phone numbers were written down. He kept telling me I was being brave. I remember praying silently and asking God to help me be brave because I didn't know what to do. God once again comforted me. All of the times my Momma and my Daddy were in the hospital I would pray and ask God to not let them die until I grew up. Those prayers were answered. I remember praying for my Daddy to be taken out of his misery from cancer and that prayer was answered. As I reflect back this morning on so many memories over my life the one thing that was constant was God. Even during the time I walked away from Him He was still with me. He never gave up on me. I am one blessed lady. I think of something Doc said in his sermon a couple weeks ago. "God doesn't want us to be happy, He wants us to be holy." I don't think he meant we can't be happy when we are holy. I think he meant holiness is greater than happiness. The desire of His heart is for us to be living a life consecrated to Him. He desires to be in charge of everything we say and do. I am so grateful for the relationship I have with Him. I also am grateful for these past few days when I was physically struggling I still had His peace. I am grateful for the way He directs me. Sometimes that means I have to tune everyone else out in order to keep my focus on Him. Many do not understand when that has to happen but He is the only One I need to answer to. The Lord took me to James 1 this morning. I love to be encouraged by His word. He stopped me at verse twenty-two and blessed me in abundance as He told me, "Daughter I love you. I am proud of you. Keep up the good work of living out this verse." Wow, God! I use to beat myself up with feeling like I didn't 'do' enough. When I began living in His supernatural power those feelings were gone. I do as He commands which is always enough! Just as yesterday when I had to shut people out in order to stay focused on Him. That wasn't an easy thing to do in my flesh but I am grateful I don't have to live in my flesh but instead can live in His spirit. I also am grateful for the way He uses people to speak to me. When Gino said, "You are going home to rest now, right?" I was kind of surprised. I wondered if I looked as bad as I felt because he had never said that to me before. When I asked Doc if I looked bad and he told me I looked worn out, it was confirmation of what I needed to do.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for yesterday and the ways You spoke to me through people! Thank You for this morning as You spoke to me directly! Lord, thank You for the memories I have growing up and for the memories You are giving me throughout these days. I must say being able to prayer with Christine these last few days has been such a blessing! Oh how I pray for healing in her back. I also pray You will use me to draw her closer to You! Father, thank You for the open doors You continue to provide for me to be Your Love to others. Lord, empower me to be a beacon of light wherever You lead me! Woo hoo! I get so excited just thinking about the possibilities You are going to provide! Father, I pray for the day ahead that You will be greater than me. I pray for a supernatural anointing to be upon me. Thank You Jesus for being My Constant! Amen.

John 14:27; 30-31 - "Blessings"

What a blessing to sit and listen to the Lord speak through Dan Bohi last night. At the end of the service to hear of sciatic pain gone, double vision gone, people able to take deep breathes for the first time in weeks, neck and back pain gone....wow...God sure showed up last night. I totally agree with Brother Dan that needs to be our normal. We don't need fancy sermons but instead need to have pastors to allow the Holy Spirit to guide the services. We need people to be consecrated to Him so when the Holy Spirit guides, they follow His lead. The Peace Brother Dan spoke of last night is the Peace I have. Living in the supernatural is where I live. If I were still living in the natural, I would be fretting over C and everything that goes along with it. I would be fretting over Doc not having extra income. I would be fretting over the church finances as we pursue the purchase of a building. I would be fretting over not seeing my family. I would be fretting over loved ones health. But instead I live out John 14:27. As Brother Dan said last night, we have a choice to make between living a life of fear or living a life of faith and love. Living a life of fear is living a life in the natural. Living a life of faith and love is living a life in the supernatural. Woo hoo! Living in the supernatural means things like what happened yesterday after my treatment. During my treatment the Lord told me to pray with the technicians. They are busy getting ready for the next patient so I could have argued about it but I didn't. When I asked the one, she said something about how she doesn't pray but the other one does and she called her. There was no answer. Finally, she gave me the ok to go ahead and pray with her which I did and she thanked me. As I was leaving the other one came around the corner and I asked if I could pray with her. She dropped her papers and said 'YES!' After I prayed she cried, hugged me and thanked me over and over. I don't know exactly what I said because it wasn't me but instead was the Holy Spirit praying. In the natural life the enemy would have put thoughts of 'they are too busy' or 'they will think you are a religious fanatic,' etc. into my mind. But the enemy does not live in me. He has no power over me because I am full of Jesus. I loved what Brother Dan said last night about the key to satan having nothing on you is when we are completely crucified to Christ and He is our dwelling place. Satan tries everything he can to pull us out of relationship with Christ. Too many times we give him credit for things we think he is doing in our lives. We must not do that. In verses thirty and thirty-one of John 14 Jesus said: I will not speak much more with you, for the ruler of the world is coming, and he has nothing in Me, but so that the world may know that I love the Father, do exactly as the Father commanded Me. Get up, let us go from here. Jesus quit talking because satan was going to hear what He was telling them. We never know where the enemy is prowling around. We must be careful to not give him any doors into our life. But this is what really hit me last night...when we are crucified to Christ and He is our dwelling place, the enemy will leave us alone. Now this is something I need to ponder. I know many times I have given the enemy credit for 'tough times.' I also know the Lord allows 'tough times' to grow our faith. As I reflect back on C...

• there were times I cried over situations such as not getting to go to Ohio for Thanksgiving but I did not live in a state of depression over it
• as the bills come in for thousands of dollars I have not fretted over where the money will come from because I know the Lord will provide
• I now realize Doc not getting a part-time job was all part of the Lord's plan because of what we continue to go through
• God brought us here so that I am fifteen minutes away from one of the best cancer centers in the nation
• I asked to go deeper and that is where He is leading me

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for treatment #4 going well yesterday but most importantly thank You for the direction to pray with my technicians. Thank You for the pleasant memories You gave me as I made the holiday cakes. Thank You for the safe travels through the fog. I also want to thank You for today. I know what is on the calendar but I am ready to do whatever You put before me. I pray a blessing over #5, the Christmas outreach at the school this afternoon and the service tonight with Brother Dan. Lord, I also pray for those who were in the service last night to grasp a life of True Peace. I pray for those who received healing to proclaim it today! Lord, Your will and Your way is the path I desire to be on throughout this day. Fill me to overflowing with more of You so Your love flows from me throughout this day. Thank You Jesus for being My Peace. Amen.