Waking up at 12:59 out of a sound sleep was not what I wanted to do but then hearing the Lord's answer to my question of 'who do I need to pray for?' wasn't what I really wanted to hear either. It is so easy for me to pray for others but when it comes to praying for myself that is more difficult. I decided last night maybe if I start at the top of my body and pray down through it I could accomplish it better. Little did I know it would take me two hours to do so. Two hours. How in the world can a person pray for themselves for two hours? It was totally a God thing, that's for sure.
I prayed for my brain to have more knowledge of Him. I prayed for God to reveal to me what to do about my next class. The finances are not totally there for it so I am struggling. Do I take a step of faith that He will open doors for me to be able to make the extra money to cover it before the bill is due? Do I take a break from class through this time of having surgery and the holidays? Part of me wants to take a break but then I keep feeling like I am not suppose to. I asked God to reveal to me what I was to do. I asked Him to open my ears up to His voice in a new way. I prayed for my eyes to be opened to more ways to cut expenses. I also prayed for my mouth to proclaim praises more. He reminded me of what Doc told me he heard in a sermon the other day. As we pray 'on earth as it is in heaven' that will come into being quicker if we praise God so He knows He is invited into our world. I asked Him to bless my words as I speak with people. I prayed for people to hear Him through me. I prayed for my heart to be cleansed of anything that was not of Him. I prayed for there to be no sign of nastiness inside it, even when I am feeling tired and ugly. I prayed for His love to ooze out of me in such a way there is no doubt He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords of my life. Since I was praying for that area of my body I also prayed for my breast that will be cut on Wednesday. I prayed for His healing to go before the surgeon and remove anything that was not to be there. I prayed for His wisdom to be upon the surgeon and all involved in the surgery. I prayed for me to do whatever it takes for the recuperation time to go well. This time of my praying took longer than a lot of the others. It hit me this week how there is so much I want to accomplish over the next few weeks and yet I don't know how long my recuperation will take before I am back to 'normal.' I prayed for His peace to overtake my entire being when panic starts to set-in. I also prayed for the breastplate of righteousness from Ephesians 6 to be on me at all times. I prayed for my hands to be His hands. I prayed for Him to give me opportunities to love on people with His love. I asked Him to reveal to me new ways to love on them. I prayed for my hip/leg pain. I asked Him to reveal to me the purpose of it. I have been praying for it to go away but realized yesterday that it may have a purpose so I need to change my prayers. I prayed for my feet to take me to places He desires me to go. It is hard being in a new place where I know few people. I am thankful for the outgoing personality God gave me that makes me know no stranger but I also need His prompting in the process of talking with people. I am thankful for opportunities such as the other night where I took a pack of crackers over to a crying boy at the park only to find out his Momma is one the Lord has put in my path three times since August. I then asked Him to reveal to me anything else I needed to pray about for myself. I waited and listened. He told me, "You are my dear Daughter and I love you dearly. Rest in me." At that point I finally fell back asleep. I know there had to be more that I prayed to have it be two hours but this must be what I was suppose to remember. It was strange to pray for myself for so long but it also was a blessed time with my Heavenly Father.
Dear Jesus,
Thank You for the time of prayer during the night. Thank You for loving me enough to make me realize I am important to You. Father, fill me with more of You so people will see and hear You through me today. I pray for Your love to ooze out of me greatly. I praise You Father for all the ways You lavish Your love on me and I desire to pass it on. Cleanse me so nothing is between You and I so this can happen. Thank You for being My Heavenly Father. Amen.
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