It was so hard to leave Ben's family yesterday. I so enjoyed my time with them. As I drove to my Momma's house I thought about the memories I made over the last couple of days and prayed for God to give me more opportunities to do so. I thought about those last months of Doc's life on this earth. He often said he wasn't afraid to die because he knew where he was going but he didn't want to die because he wanted to see the grand babies grow uup. He did not want to miss seeing them graduate high school and then college, get married, have their own children, etc. My heart broke for him as the tears fell. It broke for the grand babies who were going to miss him being in their life. Cancer stinks. Life stinks at times. There are so many times when I've cried out and asked God, 'Wny?' Sometimes there have been answers and other times not. I am thankful for the knowledge Doc is spending eternal life with the Lord. I am also thankful for the knowledge my Rickey is doing the same. I am thankful for the hope God gives us when we are in relationship with Him. Hope for each day on this earth and hope for a future with Him. I am reminded of a song Tenth Avenue North sings called "I Have This Hope."
As I walk this great unknown
Questions come and questions go
Was there purpose for the pain?
Did I cry these tears in vain?
I don't want to live in fear
I want to trust that You are near
Trust Your grace can be seen
In both triumph and tragedy
I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go
I am so thankful for the knowledge that He is with me every step of the way of life. He provides what I need physically, mentally, financially, emotionally, and most of all spiritually. Woo hoo! I am thankful thirty-eight years ago He answered our prayers for the baby in my womb. When we went in for an ultrasound and was told the baby would be born with an open spine, the tech suggested we consider aborting. Of course, that was not an option for us. We had people all over the world praying. A month later when we returned for another ultrasound we were told 'it must have been a mistake because the baby was fine.' No mistake. God healed in the womb. When Ben was born, that was proven by the scar. Woo hoo, God! As I look at this picture I took of Ben and his family I am once again amazed at God's handiwork. He is such a good, good God. I also am reminded whatever the answers are that He gives us for our prayers are the ones that are the best for us. I will never understand the 'whys' of many things but am content in knowing He knows and that is all that matters. I find it interesting He has reminded me these last two days that He is my Eternal Hope!
Dear Jesus, Thank You for my time with Ben, Emily, and the children! Thank You for this time in Orrville with my Momma! I cannot remember the last time I was in my hometown for the Fourth of July festivities. Thank You for Tom and Cheryl spending the evening with us for the parade and a sandwich! What a blessing they are to our family. Thank You for being with me with whatever is ahead in this day! Cleanse me so You can fill me to overflowing with more of You. I pray for many going through difficult days. I especially pray for Beth who is having eye surgery this morning; Carol and Jo Ann who continue to recuperate from procedures; and Cait as she recuperates. I pray for: my sisters Linda, Sally, and Mary; my brother Richard; Ben and Colleen; Pete and Delores; Steve; Mike; Norma Hall; Sharon Sebolt and her parents; Marion; Serena and her husband; some young ladies with anxiety; a man in rehab for anger issues; Chrissy; a young man out of rehab who needs strength in his daily walk; Rhonda; Mary Lilley; a husband/father separated from his wife; Preacher Bill Watts; Brooklyn; Kristen Batten; Timmy; Amber; families in turmoil; Ms Savon's friend; Cyndi; Doug and Gay; and many others. I also pray healing prayers over many who are dealing with 'c' and/or going through treatments... Sharon's daughter Ashley; Chrissy's cousins; Shirley Jones; Cait's friend with leukemia; my pastor friend with daily chemo; Betty's husband; my friend with mesothelioma; Little Ivy; and Little Judson. I pray for: the Long Family, the Tussing Family, Vickie's son Jim, and Russ. Thank You for continued improvement with Pastor Sam and Baby Henry! Lord, may You be so near to those with prodigals and near to the family of the two year old that died suddenly. Thank You for being My Eternal Hope! Amen.
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