II Timothy 1:7 - "Known"

I woke up with the lyrics to "Known" that Tauren Wells sings going through my mind. God knows everything about us. He created us. He knows our thoughts. He knows the desires of our heart. He knows us from the inside out. Not only does He know us but He loves us deeply.

I'm fully known and loved by You
You won't let go no matter what I do
And it's not one or the other
It's hard truth and ridiculous grace
To be known fully known and loved by You
I'm fully known and loved by You

Even when I doubt or allow the enemy to put 'bad' thoughts in my head, He loves me. He gives us all free choice. We make the decisions of what we do or do not do in life. He is there to guide us but He is a gentleman and does not force anything on us. He is a loving God but He also is a parent who will apply tough love. Sometimes that means He will allow us to rebel to make us realize what we really have with Him. I am grateful He took me back when I rebelled. If He would not have such a deep love for me, there would not have been grace applied to my life. His love and grace are hard to comprehend. I, nor anyone else, deserve it yet He freely gives it to us.

 

How real, how wide
How rich, how high is Your heart
I cannot find the reasons why
You give me so much

 

Yesterday started with challenges but ended in victories. I knew all along the way He was with me. I made a stupid mistake and splashed bleach on a good pair of shorts and wanted to cry. He reminded me they are just a pair of shorts. When I the took a fall an hour later, He reminded me we fall when we are not focused on what we are doing. I fell because I was not paying attention to where I was walking. That is exactly what happens when we do not stay focused on Him in our daily lives. I was upset when the bacon on my BLT was crispy instead of limpy. He reminded me I had food. Those challenges were nothing compared to the victories received with a 'clean' mammogram and finding out Doc's chemo was back to the Wednesday schedule. Woo hoo, God! He reminded me II Timothy 1:7 tells me He gives me power, love, and sound mind to live out daily instead of the fear the enemy put on me over my mammogram. He also reminded me that the fretting I did over the change in chemo day was worthless. I need to trust Him more. I need to go deeper in my faith. So now as I face a new day I need to remember the lessons from yesterday. I need to not fear anything but instead lean into Him more. I am physically spent. I feel like my body can't continue on but then He gently reminds me it does not have to continue on in my strength. It just needs to lean into His strength in a greater way. I need to stay focused and live in His empowerment. I may not understand everything that happens in the day ahead but I don't have to. God knows all. Nothing will surprise Him. He will win in the end. Woo hoo!

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for the blessings of yesterday with the 'clean' mammogram and Doc's chemo being changed back to Wednesday schedule. Thank You for the way You spoke to me and gave me strength throughout the day. Father, these are some tough days physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially but I do not want them to negatively affect me spiritually. I desire to go deeper in my faith. Lord, cleanse me so You can fill me so my faith will deepen and Your love will flow freely from me. Lord, I ask for more of You. I pray for You to fill me to overflowing with Your Holy Spirit. I pray for Doc as he has chemo today. I thank You for him having physical strength yesterday to go with me. Lord, show Him Your empowerment today in a new, different way. Go before us today and open doors that need opened and close those that need closed. Thank You Jesus for being The One Who Knows Us! Amen.

II Timothy 1:7; Psalm 1 - "When The Waters Rise"

It seems like after almost three years I would not longer get 'antsy' about having a mammogram. They all have been 'clean' since the breast cancer so I shouldn't have anything to be concerned about. Last night the tears fell and I asked Doc to pray for me. It was happening again. I could not go to sleep for the longest time. The thought about the 'what ifs' and what we would do if we both were facing cancer at the same time. I prayed and asked God for peace and sleep and it eventually came. I was awake many times during the six short hours that followed and every time I felt His peace. Then when I got up the 'what ifs' started going around in my mind. God led me back to II Timothy 1:7...

God did not make me, Sheila, to be fearful. God made me to live empowered through His Holy Spirit. He made me to love with His love and to walk in His will. (My Paraphrase)

Then He reminded me of a song MikesChair sings called "Let The Waters Rise." IF there is something showing on the mammogram, He will be right there with me. I have nothing to fear. I cannot allow the enemy an open door into my life.

There's a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees

So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You

These words speak greatly to me this morning. The results of the mammogram will not be a surprise to Him. I must trust Him with them. I must not allow the enemy to put fear upon me. I must allow God's love to work in and through me in this process. I need to also remember...

God Your love is enough
You will pull me through
I'm holding onto You
God Your love is enough
I will follow You
I will follow You

As I do, I will be one of those people described in Psalm 1:3...

He will be standing firm like a flourishing tree planted by God’s design, deeply rooted by the brooks of bliss, bearing fruit in every season of his life. He is never dry, never fainting, ever blessed, ever prosperous (TPT).

I want to be deeply rooted in Him. The way to do that is to not only accept Him into your heart but then to allow Him to cleanse you fully so sin is not the first thing you think of. Instead, His will is what guides your life. I want to walk in obedience to His word. The way to do that better is by being in His Word. Pondering it. Studying it. Allowing it to become one with you. This Psalm tells us we are to meditate on it day and night. You cannot soak something in if you do not submerge yourself in it. There may come a day when we won't have the gift of reading our Bible. What will happen then? I pray for His Word to be engrained in my mind so much that it will come to me. I pray His Words will flow off my lips in a way that will undoubtedly be through His supernatural empowerment. Woo hoo!

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for being so close yesterday when the enemy tried to tear us down! Thank You for the way You encouraged me to be at peace in the midst of chaos brought upon us! Thank You for bringing this Scripture and song to me this morning! Father, I am standing on II Timothy 1:7 today but in order to do that I must be cleansed so You can fill me with Yourself. Take anything that is between us and wipe it away. May You be my strength for whatever is ahead in this day. May You knock the enemy down when He comes knocking at my door. Lord, I pray for encouragement for Doc. I pray You will put people before him that will say or do things to encourage him. I continue to pray for his physical healing from the cancer sooner than later. The chemo is wearing him down not just physically but also emotionally and mentally. I pray for protection around his spiritual being. God Your love is enough are words in this song that I will cling to today in a mighty way. No matter what the outcome of my mammogram, I will lean into You and be thankful. Thank You for being My Everything! Amen.

II Timothy 1:7; Psalm 43; Hebrews 6:19-20 - "Raise A Hallelujah"

I woke up this morning with the words to "Raise A Hallelujah" in my mind...

I raise a hallelujah, in the presence of my enemies
I raise a hallelujah, louder than the unbelief
I raise a hallelujah, my weapon is a melody
I raise a hallelujah, Heaven comes to fight for me

I'm gonna sing, in the middle of the storm
Louder and louder, you're gonna hear my praises roar
Up from the ashes, hope will arise
Death is defeated, the King is alive!

Praising God makes the enemy mad and God happy. Raising praises in the middle of tough days strengthens me. It renews my hope and takes my faith deeper. The more I praise Him, the 'easier' these tough days are. I cannot and will not allow the enemy to take away my joy. Instead I will praise God and allow Him to fill me with more of His joy. Music is soothing to my soul every day but on days where it seems like I can't go on it is a life line God provides to me. I don't believe Doc's pancreatic cancer is from the enemy but I believe the enemy is working to tear us apart through it. He is doing everything in his power to put doubts and discouragement in us. We must remember that our God is more powerful than him. Our God encourages when the enemy discourages. This morning the Lord took me to Psalm 43 to ponder. As I began to read it, I thought about how many times over the last three months I have cried out to God asking Him to protect me from the enemy. David seems to feel like God has left him in verse two. In The Passion Translation it reads:

For you are where my strength comes from and my protector, so why would you leave me now? Must I be covered with gloom while the enemy comes after me, gloating with glee?

I don't feel like He has left me but I do have to continually pray against the attacks of the enemy during these tough days. Verses three and four in The Message are what I am continually praying for.

Give me your lantern and compass, give me a map,
So I can find my way to the sacred mountain, to the place of your presence,
To enter the place of worship, meet my exuberant God,
Sing my thanks with a harp, magnificent God, my God.

I pray for God to direct my life in a way that I will not fall into the traps of the enemy. The only way to do this is to live in His presence, twenty-four/seven. To live in such a way I must be cleansed in order to be filled with more of Him. As I live in this manner, I will receive the blessings found in verses five and six in The Passion Translation.

Then I will say to my soul, “Don’t be discouraged; don’t be disturbed, for I fully expect my Savior-God to break through for me. Then I’ll have plenty of reasons to praise him all over again.” Yes, living before his face is my saving grace!

Yes! That last sentence says it all. Yes, living before his face is my saving grace! Woo hoo! I just love how God wakes me up with a song and Scripture to ponder upon. I love how I not only hear His voice but I follow His direction. He is my Anchor in this storm of pancreatic cancer in Doc. I am reminded of the words of Hebrews 6:19-20. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf. He has become a high priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek (NIV). He is my Hope and I will continue to seek more of Him. In The Treasury of David Commentary it reads of Psalm 43:

Verse 1-2,4-5. Five mys:  

1. My cause -- "plead it." 
2. My strength -- "thou art." 
3. My joy -- God is. 
4. My soul -- "why disquieted." 
5. My God.

Yes! He is all of these things to me and for that I am so grateful. I love what this commentary says about 'joy' in verse four. It reads:

Note the holy rapture with which David regards his Lord! He is not his joy alone, but his exceeding joy; not the fountain of joy, the giver of joy, or the maintainer of joy, but that joy itself. The margin hath it, "The gladness of my joy," i.e., the soul, the essence, the very bowels of my joy. To draw near to God, who is such a joy to us, may well be the object of our hungering and thirsting. Yea, upon the harp will I praise thee. His best music for his best love. When God fills us with joy we ought ever to pour it out at his feet in praise, and all the skill and talent we have should be laid under contribution to increase the divine revenue of glory. O God, my God. How he dwells upon the name which he loves so well! He already harps on it as though his harp music had begun. What sweeter sounds can music know than these four words? To have God in possession, and to know it by faith, is the heart's heaven -- a fulness of bliss lies therein.

Yes! The joy God provides, even in the midst of the storms of life, is incomparable to any other. In The Passion Translation it is described as ecstatic joy! The New King James Version described is as exceeding joy! In the New Living Translation God is described as the source of all my joy! This is how we can have joy during times of trials. We have God as our Hope. This is why we need to "Raise A Hallelujah" to Him when the enemy comes knocking. That is what I will do throughout this day. I will praise Him even when it may not be easy to do. In doing so, I will knock the enemy down and live in God's joy! I will stand upon II Timothy 1:7 so I can live out Psalm 43:5!

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God! (NLT)

Dear Jesus,
Thank You seems so inadequate for the way I am feeling right now. You are so awesome in the way You bring before me a song and Scripture to start off my day. Lord, cleanse me so You can fill me so I can live out this Scripture today. Knock the enemy down when he comes before me. Strengthen me spiritually so I can be stronger in You. Father, sometimes I feel guilty to focus my prayers on myself but right now I need to feel more of You. I do not want to fall prey to the enemy. I am putting on the armor You tell us to put on daily as I begin my day. I need Your protection in a mighty way. Lord, encourage Doc today. Father, these tough days are hard to get through but I know You are greater than pancreatic cancer. May Your glory show through to him today in a new, different way. Thank You for being Our Hope! Amen.

II Timothy 1:7 - "Make Me A Blessing"

The Lord woke me multiple times during the night to pray for pastors. There were different things He had me pray for but the one that kept coming back to my prayers was for pastors who would be in the pulpit this morning and the Holy Spirit would take over. First of all, He had me pray for the pastors to be open to this. Second, He had me pray for the people to respond. Third, He had me pray for the Spirit to not be quenched by the pastor or the people.  When we say 'yes' to the Holy Spirit being in charge of our life, we have nothing to fear. II Timothy 1:7 reminds us that God does not cause fear but instead is the root of love and empowerment. The enemy is the one who causes chaos and fear in our life. He is the one to make us think others are against us. God does not have any part in negative. He is only a positive God. He may allow negative things to happen in our life but that is for our own good. When He is in control and negative things happen, our faith is taken deeper. We must remember that. We also must remember when negative things happen, they are not always from the devil. Therefore, we should not always give him the credit. One time when He woke me to pray, He gave me a vision of a pastor kneeling to pray before going into the pulpit. Prayer is key for all of us but especially for pastors. We cannot be the leader God called us to be if we are not in communication with Him. We also need to be the example for others by living such a life. When we allow God to have total control of every aspect of our being, we will be setting the right example for others. We are not perfect but people need to see us striving to be Christ-like. They need to see us living a life where every decision made is done through Him. They need to see us live out the storms of life with His peace and in His strength. The only way to live such a life is to confess our sins and ask for a cleansing in our Spirit. This needs to happen daily. God had me pray for pastors that are trying to minister to people when they are not in this kind of relationship with Him. He had me pray for ones who have taken on a life of feeling like they are 'ok' in their spiritual life just because they are a pastor. He also had me pray they will wake up before they fall. Some nights of praying are tougher than others and last night was one of them. There are times when praying for others makes me emotional and this was one of them. Maybe it's because I am a pastor myself that makes it that way. I know pastors seem to be watched more than others. I also know there are many pastors and their families who feel like they live in a fishbowl. Pastors and their families are just ordinary people but God has called them to be leaders which means they will be watched more closely. I pray every day for God to cleanse me so He can fill me. The desire of my heart is to live a Christ-like life. That does not mean I won't make mistakes. I am human so I will. But it does mean I will strive to not sin. It also means I will strive to love with His love. God had me pray for all believers but especially pastors to love with His love more. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for a night of prayer for pastors! Thank You for loving me enough that You give me this responsibility of intercessory prayer! Lord, cleanse me so You can fill me with more of Your Holy Spirit. I know that is the only way I can strive to live a Christ-like life. Ooze out of me in a new, different way throughout this day. Father, I pray You will be with Doc today. I pray You will empower him to preach without issues and not just get through the service but to be bold in his spirit. I pray for people to respond to what he preaches. Lord, I also pray once again for all pastors to be open to the Holy Spirit to take over their sermons today. I pray for all pastors to be prayed up so they will be ready for whatever You have in store for them. Lord, I pray for Your love to ooze out of all pastors. May You be greater than our earthly bodies. Thank You Jesus for being The One Who Has Called Me! Amen. 

II Timothy 1:7; Hebrews 11 - "Confidence"

This morning the Lord told me to read Hebrews 11. When He did, I thought of how this is known by many as the 'faith chapter' in the Bible. As I started reading it, He brought the song "Confidence" to my mind...

So give me faith like Daniel in the lion's den
Give me hope like Moses in the wilderness
Give me a heart like David, Lord be my defense
So I can face my giants with confiden

I do desire to have great faith as Daniel had when he was thrown into the lion's den. I desire to live in "Confidence" as many mentioned in Hebrews 11 did. This chapter begins with these words: Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. Woo hoo! As humans, we want to know everything. We want to know when things will happen and how. We have plan A, B, C, etc. to make them happen. But that is truly not the way to live. Instead we need to live in His presence so He will direct what and when things happen or do not happen in life. This may sound hard to do but it truly is not. When we live in His presence, we no longer worry about the particulars of situations. We know God is in control and He will reveal to us what we need to know, when we need to know it. I remember a few years ago I was happy being a Medical Chaplain when God called me to preach. I argued with God. I said there was no way I would ever preach because Doc is the preacher in the family. Fast forward to now. The same month I completed my classes at Nazarene Bible College Doc was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I am ready every Sunday to preach if he is unable. I am leading the Wednesday night adult Bible study and have taken on other parts of ministry along with preaching when needed. God prepared me for this season of life years ago when we were in a church with Pastor James could have taken this role. Now we are in a church where I am the only one available. God knows what we need. He knows what we will face. Nothing surprises Him. When we live a life of faith, we may be surprised by circumstances but we will not be devastated because we know He is in control. Hebrews 11 reminds us of great people who lived by faith. The first three verses are described by Matthew Henry as:

Faith always has been the mark of God's servants, from the beginning of the world. Where the principle is planted by the regenerating Spirit of God, it will cause the truth to be received, concerning justification by the sufferings and merits of Christ. And the same things that are the object of our hope, are the object of our faith. It is a firm persuasion and expectation, that God will perform all he has promised to us in Christ. This persuasion gives the soul to enjoy those things now; it gives them a subsistence or reality in the soul, by the first-fruits and foretastes of them. Faith proves to the mind, the reality of things that cannot be seen by the bodily eye. It is a full approval of all God has revealed, as holy, just, and good. 

I like his wording that faith is "a full approval" from God. We will receive His fullness as we receive His Holy Spirit into our lives. There will be a peace in the midst of the turmoils of life that is unexplainable as we live in His Presence. His love will flow from us when we ask Him to cleanse and fill us with more of Himself. We will no longer have a 'to-do' list as we strive to live in His will. Instead we will walk where He directs, do what He puts before us, and know we are doing what He desires of us. Verse thirteen reminds us we may not always get what we want on this earth but as we live by faith we will receive eternity with the Lord which is the perfect gift to receive. I desire to live by faith. The only way to have such a life is to stand upon II Timothy 1:7 by allowing Him to cleanse me so He can fill me with His supernatural strength to not fear pancreatic cancer in my husband; my upcoming mammogram; the financial deficit for the church building rehab; medical bills; loss of income; etc. I will live by faith as I live in His presence. I have nothing to fear because God already knows the outcome and He will win. Woo hoo! There is nothing on this earth that can take me away from living by faith because I am filled with His Holy Spirit which empowers me to stand against the enemy.

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for this Scripture and song this morning that encourages me greatly! Thank You for the way You direct my path to walk by faith! As I look back on my life, You always provided exactly what was needed when it was needed. You have provided for physical needs so many times when my parents had health issues and You had people bless my family with groceries, money, etc. Why? Because my parents walked in great faith. Thank You for the way they taught me to walk by faith, love on others with Your love, and listen to You. Thank You for the way You continue to encourage my Momma as she continues to live for You! Father, I pray my children/grandchildren will see great faith in me. Lord, cleanse me so You can fill me today with more of You. Increase my faith as I live in Your presence. Open my eyes to anything I might miss today that You have for me. Lord, I pray blessings over Doc today. I pray You will take away the fatigue and ickiness today so he will be strengthened. He desires to be Your servant to preach. He desires to be stronger in his physical body so He can be more of who You have called him to be. We do not understand 'why' he is going through this but we understand You are with us and will empower us to do what You desire. Father, I pray for my friend who had the interview but did not receive the teaching position; my other friend who has a second interview; my pastor friend who is currently out of the pulpit; and my friend whose job is changing. I pray each one of them will walk by faith and listen for Your direction. Lord, be with Jim, Kim, and their family today as they have the memorial service for Sandie. May they feel Your presence in a mighty way. I also pray for my friend Mike with his gout and his home situation with his wife's addiction. Once again, may he walk by faith and know You are there with him. Thank You Jesus for being My Faith Builder! Amen.

II Timothy 1:7; Psalm 47 - "Ever Be"

This morning God took me to Psalm 47. I wondered why and He told me "you will understand" and I did. This Psalm is about praising God. Some days it may seem easier to praise God than other days. But no matter what we are going through He always blesses us in one way or another. A beautiful sunset, the beauty of blooming flowers, a cool breeze on a hot day...the list goes on and on. When you walk into an infusion lab and see people physically so far worse than you, it makes you appreciate the health you have. When you hear of a young child suffering with disease or has died, you appreciate your children and  grandchildren even more. Tough days will occur but God is always there for us. He is always our strength. We have nothing to fear because He always wins! I love the last verse of Psalm 47 in The Message...The power of earth are God's-he soars over all. Woo hoo, God! I must remember to stay in right relationship with Him with nothing between us so I can be empowered by Him. I must remember there is nothing that will surprise Him. He knows all before it even happens. He will empower me as I allow Him to. In this process, I must never quit praising Him. But it can't just be a lip service. It must be a genuine praise. I must feel it before I say it. There are so many times I will utter "Praise God" because of something happening like an item I go to buy being on sale. But when it is said there is not much emphasis or boldness. I need to be stronger in my praises! "PRAISE GOD" is what needs heard. I like what Matthew Henry writes about the last part of this Psalm:

Set up thy kingdom in our hearts. Bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. And so sweetly constrain all the powers and faculties of the souls of thy redeemed, into holy love, fear, and delight in thee, that praise with the understanding may rise from every heart, both here and for ever, to Thee, our God.

Oh how I love that phrase, "Set up thy kingdom in our hearts." That is exactly what I want to experience every day of my life. I want to be Christ-like. I desire for people to see and hear Him through me. In order for that to happen, I first must surrender to His will and walk in obedience to Him. As I live this life, His "praise will ever be on my lips." Woo hoo!

cDear Jesus,

Thank You for this Scripture that speaks so boldly to me this morning! Thank You for always opening my eyes to things I need to work on in my spirit! Thank You for the opportunities You presented to me yesterday and the ones ahead in this day! Father, cleanse me so I can be filled with more of Your Holy Spirit. The desire of my heart is to walk in Your Spirit in a new, different way. Lord, I continue to pray for Doc to have better days but I thank You he is not as 'bad' as some we saw yesterday at the infusion center. I pray You will continue to give doctors wisdom and continue to use the chemo to shrink the tumor. Father, I also ask for You to continue to give us wisdom in financial decisions. May You keep in my mind that You are greater than anything that happens on this earth. Father, I have some friends who are going through struggles in life that I pray will allow You to be their King of Kings and Lord of Lords. I pray they will see a reason to praise You today. Thank You Jesus for being My Praise! Amen.

II Timothy 1:7 - "Glorious Day"

The Lord woke me up throughout the night with the words to a song Passion sings called "Glorious Day"...

You called my name
And I ran out of that grave
Out of the darkness
Into Your glorious day

Now Your mercy has saved my soul
Now Your freedom is all that I know
The old made new
Jesus, when I met You

Each day we wake up should be a glorious day dedicated to Him. Before my feet the floor I praise Him for another day of life and ask Him to go before me. The last thing I do before falling asleep is thank Him for the day. We all need to have a spirit of thanksgiving no matter what is happening in our life. Yesterday He blessed me with a resolve in our house payment situation that I have been battling for several weeks. I prayed and asked God for wisdom; He told me what to do; I followed His advice; and the mortgage company realized they were wrong. Woo hoo! Not only is the payment not raising by $250ish but it actually dropped by $18! I was beginning to wonder if I was thinking wrong with all that is happening in our little world but God continued to encourage me with things to do and we were blessed. There is such freedom when we submit totally to the Lord. He is there to direct us, encourage us, love on us...the list goes on and on. The most important thing everyone needs is to accept Jesus into their heart but they cannot stop there. They must take the next step and allow Him to be their Lord of Lords and King of Kings. We all must die to self. When we do, we will see things through His eyes. "The old made new" is just the beginning of a life with Christ. Every day is a glorious day when we live with Him in control. Are the trials of this earth taken away? Absolutely not! It is through the trials of life we go deeper in our faith! Is it 'easy' to live such a life? In the beginning I did not think so but once I realized He is in control and nothing surprises Him I began to understand it is easy. I don't have to worry about anything. He takes care of all. I will continue to stand upon II Timothy 1:7 and not fear pancreatic cancer in my husband. His strength will empower me to not only get through whatever is ahead but to thrive. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank You for Your love, mercy, and grace! Thank You for Your sanctifying empowerment! Thank You for the blessings of yesterday and the ones ahead in this day! Father, cleanse me so You can fill me to overflowing with more of You. May Your Holy Spirit be in total control of my words, actions, and attitude. Father, I pray for all of the concerns on my heart to be in Your hands. I pray for Doc as he goes for chemo today. I pray for both of us as this is his first time of me not being there. I ask for this treatment to shrink the tumor more than ever so surgery can be done to remove it. I pray for my friend who has an interview today. May Your will be done in her life. I continue to pray for my pastor friend who is not currently in the pulpit to continue to seek Your will for his life. Lord, last night in Bible study You reminded us that You always win. No matter what is happening in our lives, even if we die, You win. I pray for favor and blessings over the deficit with the building project. May You open doors that need opened and close those that need closed. Most of all, may You win in this situation! Thank You Jesus for being My Glorious Day! Amen.