The Christmas season is hard to get through with the 'extras' on the calendar in 'normal' times. When you add-in somethings such as pancreatic cancer, it gets even harder. I'm so tired of trying to keep up with everything on the calendar and going through 'tough' days with Doc. I'm physically, mentally, and emotionally drained. Last night when Sandy asked how we were doing I let it pour out. I apologized afterward but then I thought about how God put her into my life for a reason. He had her ask last night for a reason. Why? Because He knows what I need before I even realize the need. He knows I feel like I'm falling apart emotionally. He knows my frustration with trying to hold everything together and missing doing some things. He knows my desire to have normalcy in our life right now. He knows I need reminded that I need to stand upon II Timothy 1:7 to be empowered by the Holy Spirit to not just get through these days but for Him to be glorified through them. Plain and simple. He knows. I am so grateful for that knowledge. I also am grateful He does not see me as having a weak faith but instead sees me as digging deeper into my faith as I trust Him through these 'tough' days. I am grateful for the way He guides me through them. I am grateful for His voice that I hear and strive to walk in obedience to. I am grateful for the people He puts in my path to encourage me. Last night with the children and teens was a great encouragement. Seeing them get excited about 'shopping' from the items Carrie and I gathered was awesome. Watching them pick out items that were 'perfect' for their moms and dads was priceless. Then watching them sitting and listening to Doc read the Christmas story was the icing on the cake! Even though I was stressed over other circumstances I was blessed through our time together. God knew what I needed and He provided. Woo hoo!
Dear Jesus,
Thank You for the blessings of yesterday and the ones ahead in this day! Thank You for our time with the children and teens last night! Thank You for giving Doc strength to ride along on the van and then read the Christmas story to the group! Thank You for Ms Carrie and Chris; Ms Rhonda; Ms Sherri; and Joshua for helping last night! Thank You for giving wisdom for us to get the paperwork that was needed done for the church building! Thank You in advance for giving Doc what he needs for today's chemo! Lord, I pray against side effects. I pray this week will not be as 'bad' as last week. Empower him Father with Your supernatural strength. Once again, I beg of You to heal Him sooner than later while he is on this earth. Lord, I pray for a cleansing in my spirit so You can fill me to overflowing with Your Holy Spirit. I pray for people to see/hear You instead of me today in my words, actions, and attitude. I also pray for the family of those killed in the car accident last night. I pray for people to surround them with Your love. I also pray Dale's infection will be healed so he can be released to go home; Emma will be well enough to be released to go home; and Craig will continue to make progress and be able to go home. Lord, thank You for being the Great Physician that can do way more than any doctor on this earth. Thank You for being My One to Know! Amen.
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