On the way to church yesterday morning the tears fell as I thought about how it was my 'first' Sunday morning with Rickey not encouraging me for the service ahead. I was still in Ohio last week and yesterday was my first Sunday back. It was an emotional time but God was so, so good to give me exactly what I needed to not just get through the day but for Him to be glorified through it. I need to watch the sermon as so many people commented how good it was. I know I had a couple places where I failed to complete a sentence on my manuscript but God took care of things. He always does and praise His Holy Name He always will. Yesterday afternoon He gave me time with my tribe over lunch, I took a teen to work, did a hospital visit, and came home to visits from three people. Miss Everly said something about me still being in my church clothes when they came over around 5:00. It was a full day but it was a blessed day. I decided to get into my night shirt before eating my yummy supper from my dear neighbors Sharon and Trevor. After eating I took a little nap and then just vegetated for the evening. I did a few little things but mainly just allowed myself to bask in God's presence. One of the things I did was to hang a picture I bought Rickey for Christmas. He always said I took his breath away and when I saw this in a thrift store I bought it. At the time he was in ICU but I really thought he would pull out of it. Sometimes what we think or what we want is not what God allows to happen. The picture I chose to put in it was our first one taken together. This saying is so appropriate for my life right now since losing him. We made a lot of great memories and I am sad there will not be more made. But I know God is with me to get through the 'tough' days. He is with me to give me His wisdom and love. He is with me to make sure I stay focused on Him. Praise His Holy Name! Plain and simple. He is with me. I am reminded of the words in Exodus 14:14 which read, The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. I am so thankful for this knowledge. I also am grateful for the words of James 4:8, Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. God is so good to us when we allow Him. He is ready to be exactly what we need but we must be focused on Him and allow Him to be Who He desires to be in our life. Then, and only then, we will be who He desires us to be. I am reminded of the words to a song Kari Jobe sings...
In the midst of deep sorrow
I see Your light is breaking through
The dark of night will not overtake me
I am pressing into You
Lord, You fight my every battle
And I will not fear
I am not alone
I am not alone
You will go before me
You will never leave me
Dear Jesus, Thank You for all the ways You loved on me yesterday! Thank You for Your Word and this song that encourages me! Thank You for continuing to be with Anna, Michael, Matt, and myself as we navigate through life without Rickey with us! Lord, I know this is trivial in the whole scheme of life but would You heal the cut on my finger. It is very difficult to type and today is when I planned to do a lot of computer work. Father, if You are changing those plans so be it. Cleanse me so You can fill me to overflowing with more of You. I don't know that I will leave the house today but I pray people will hear/see You instead of me. Lord, thank You for giving my Momma recollection on where she put a gift card last night. Thank You for continuing to be with her during these 'tough' days! I pray peace upon her and many others. My sisters Linda, Sally, and Mary; Ben and Colleen; Pete and Delores; Steve; Tony and Madeline; Cait; Mike; Norma Hall; Carrie; Little Jensen who needs a heart; many with COVID; Sharon Sebolt; the Pottenger Family; Serena's husband; some young ladies with anxiety; a man in rehab for anger issues; a young man out of rehab who needs strength in his daily walk; a husband/father separated from his wife; Cyndi; and many others. I also pray healing prayers over many who are dealing with 'c'...Doug and Gay; Sharon's daughter Ashley and niece Amy; Chrissy's cousin; George and Sharon; Cait's friend with leukemia; my pastor friend with daily chemo; Elaine Stoltzfus; and Little Ivy. I pray Your strong presence for: Steve Curless with his surgery today; Jennifer's coworker whose mother appears to be in her last days on this earth; Billie with her foot injury; a family in turmoil with the Momma possibly going to a nursing home; and Rhonda with her situation. Thank You for all the ways You love on us and take care of us! Thank You for the yummy dinner from Sharon and Trevor last night! Thank You for all of the people You put in my path yesterday and for the ones You will put in my path today! Thank You for being My Fighter! Amen.
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